Monday, September 5, 2011


(Who didn't love Monopoly growing up?- hated that card, though)

Just a few thoughts I've had within the past few days about the game called "Love".

I can't say I have ever been "in love" but I can say that I have learned a lot from the few short relationships I have had and have experienced from friends and family standing on the outside looking in. It's always interesting to me when friends come to me, asking for advice with their relationship, seeing as I haven't had as much first hand experience as they have.

Ok boys, here it goes.

If you like a girl, don't text her all day and invite her over at night, or on weekends when it's most convenient for you. Your intentions are clear. And if she has enough respect for herself, she will decline.

Take her out on a date. I know that is a big step and you feel vulnerable because you may get shot down, but chances are, she'll like you more in return for alone just taking that step.
And the last thing a girl wants to do is plan her own date. Take her out to a place where YOU have chosen. Make her feel like you've put thought and effort into this night, because she's worth it.

Call her. Even if she hates talking on the phone. Show her you want to hear her voice. She wants to hear yours too.

Surprise her. Send her flowers. Yes, it sounds so cookie cutter, but that's what we want.

Tell her what you're thinking- communicate. We can't read your mind. And we (well, most of us) are not about to play games to try and figure it out.

If you don't try, you'll never know. I think a problem with guys now-a-days (trust me, girls have their long list of problems too!) is that they've been hurt before (I know, girls have had their share of heart breaks too, but just hear me out). Their hearts are just as fragile as girls'. Once they've been hurt, they don't want to be hurt again (who does?). So they put on this front and flirt and try to get just as far as they can before getting attached. I have found this in several guys I have met. It truly breaks my heart when they say things like, "I'm afraid to commit.", "I've been hurt before...She ripped my heart out.", or "That's why I don't love." (real quotes). After I hear that, I get it. It all makes sense. They got hurt once or twice and have an ego (be honest boys, you have one- and personally I think it's a good thing) that they don't want to ruin again. They don't want to let another girl in and are afraid to commit. Then what happens when a good girl comes around and you don't give her a chance? She is now lost.

This is the game of love. It's hard. But sometimes you gotta fall and get hurt before you stand up and win.
Love wins, by the way.

And girls, same thing goes for us. Give him a chance. Half the time he doesn't know what in the world he is doing either. I'm trying to teach myself this too. I need to get better at it. Sometimes it's an automatic "NO" without even knowing him at all. Give him a chance. Also, we're so quick to be sarcastic, at their expense, and argue with them. "They can take it. They're a guy." Yea, it's true. They should be able to give it back, argue with me, defend your point- without being hurtful. But ladies, build them up, encourage them, show them compassion. They need a little TLC too.

“The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. 

He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn 

and feel and change and grow and love and live.”

-Leo F. Buscaglia

1 comment:

  1. Girlllll, preach it! I appreciate how you encourage women to step up to the plate too. And, I also like how you mention that "love wins." I need to stop being so damn cynical so that love will find me. Our Mr. Bigs will find us:)

    Great post!!